Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Scrawny Chef

Remember that recipe blog I started a while back? Well, I was asked to start posting pictures with my recipes, which I had been thinking about doing but somehow talked myself out of. I have a cruddy little point and shoot digital camera. I have no artist photography ability at all. And I always forget. But the last week I decided that I don't care and I've remembered! So go check out Scrawny Chef because I just posted 6 new recipes with photos!! The previous 34 or so recipes will just have to wait until I get around to making them again because I'm not going to sit around making each of them simply to post the photo. Sorry. :) Anyway, go check it out and if you try something let me know what you thought or how it turned out!! And remember: Photos may be blurry or shadowed or grainy or just plain bad. View at your own risk.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

I'm not good at keeping secrets.

And I've kept this one for 2 whole days now. Well, that's really not true. I told way too many people even though I told myself I wasn't going to. So, in case you weren't one of those, here you go:

Baby Ralls #3 is on its way!!

Surprised?! So was I! Not planned, but we're super excited!! I'm BARELY pregnant. Only 4 weeks. I know it's ridiculous that I'm already telling everyone this early, but that's me! I'm due July 6th. The plan is not to find out the gender (although the plan was also not to tell anyone until we were further along). And so far, other than being super tired and my boobs killing me, I feel great! Crossing my fingers that morning sickness doesn't strike.

I just found out yesterday and had to send Jason a picture message of the test. He was just as shocked and just as excited.

And this means that I won't be trying to lose weight any longer. However, my plan is to stick to my workouts for now and then adjust them as the belly grows, and to continue eating how I am now, other than adding that 200-300 calories. The goal is to gain about 15 pounds with this pregnancy (which is healthy when you're already overweight). I plan to keep up with my weekly weigh ins, things will just be a little different now.

Anyway, I just got home from a late stake leadership primary meeting and got the kids to bed and I AM BEAT!! So goodnight!!

Monday, October 26, 2009

Weekly Weigh In - Week 5 and Halloween

This week was a tad stressful, for multiple reasons. There was the primary program, Jason left for work again for his two week stint, the weather was changing so of course the kids were acting up all week, and some other random things here and there. Plus, I don't think I've gotten around to cleaning my house in three weeks. My floors are gross.

Remember how I was going to splurge last Monday? It was heaven! So needed! I ordered way more than I could eat. And it was delicious!! My kids got the leftovers for lunch the next day. And I managed to only gain 1/2 a pound. (By the way, Jack just walked up to me with two pens shoved up his nose...boys.)

After my little splurge night I got right back on track and did pretty well all week. I tried some new recipes (which I'll be posting on my recipe blog as soon as I upload the photos of them!) and I did the 2nd week workout on the 12 week program I'm doing. It was rough! It was kickboxing and, for me, it was HARD! I told Jason that I was super happy to be done with it and then I realized that later on in the program it will come back to find me, alongside even more toughness. I think I'll cry that day.

Saturday was hard. We had a pizza party with the kids after the program practice. I figured I'd eat super healthy all day, but allow myself two slices of pizza. I packed carrot sticks to eat alongside my pizza. But pizza is a weakness of mine. I was starving and I just couldn't stop myself! I ended up eating 2 1/2 slices and 1/2 of Jack's yummy frosted sugar cookie. I gained another 1/2 pound, but it was totally worth it! As long as I don't eat like that too often I figure I can't be too upset with myself.

So this morning the verdict was 3.2 pounds this week! Yay! I'm at 168 pounds even. My BMI is now at 27.1, not great yet, but on it's way down! I've lost a total of 14 pounds in 34 days. Of course I'd love to be losing the weight faster, but I really can't complain. I'm losing. And at a healthy pace. And that's what really matters. I'm not going to lie and pretend that I don't wish it would all just fall off on its own. Because the truth is, I'd love to be skinny and fit right now. But my ultimate goal is health and I know that the end result of this long process will be that much more rewarding because I worked so hard for it.

Today starts week 3 of my workout program. I watched the workout (in fast forward mode) the other night and it looks like fun! Although super tough. Lots of push ups. Yuck. But hopefully I'll have a super toned chest and arms by the end of this week!! Wish me luck with that!

I'm actually really excited for this whole week. The weekend was busy, but lonely because Jason was gone and as busy as we were, we weren't as busy as we normally are during the week. (Which would make one wonder why I didn't clean my house...well, because I was lazy is the true answer to that question). But this week we're carving pumpkins, Payson has ballet, the kids have playgroup, and Payson has preschool (it got canceled last week because her teacher, who happens to be my friend and second counselor in the primary, her husband got swine flu and she runs the preschool out of her home, so she had to cancel until he recovered and disinfected her house). On Wednesday night there are a couple of fun Halloween specials on tv. The kids and I decided we'll do baths and scriptures and everything early that night so that we can pop some kettle corn (healthier!) and curl up in mom's bed to watch the shows. I love snuggling up with those two super cute babies!! On Thursday the kids get to wear their costumes to library story time and Payson gets to wear hers again to preschool.

And then we're headed to Grandma's house in Utah for the weekend!! I love our little Halloween traditions at my parents' house. The kids love ringing Grandma's doorbell and trick or treating. She makes a big deal about their costumes (even though she's already seen them) and gives them extra candy. She always makes Taco Soup with all the good stuff (sour cream, cheese, avocado) and she also makes Hershey Kiss Cookies and has it all waiting for us when we get home all cold and ready to be warmed up from trick or treating. And my dad hooks his trailer up to the four wheeler, we throw blankets in the back, and he drives us around the neighborhood instead of walking from house to house. Lazy, I know. But really fun!! The kids can't wait! And they especially love getting to trick or treat with their Aunt Madie and Aunt Maren and all the girls' friends. And I'm sure Uncle Devin and Uncle Brennan will drop by too. LOVE my family!! We also plan to go to Cornbelly's at Thanksgiving Point, which we have done every year since Payson was tiny and they can not wait!

I'll have LOTS of pictures to post when I get back! I think I'm just about as excited as the kids are. :) Although I'm a little nervous about all that good food and candy. It's always harder to eat healthy when I'm not at home to cook for myself and I don't have all that candy sitting out screaming at me. So wish me luck with that this weekend too!! Hope you all have a great Halloween week!!

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Because I know you're all just DYING to know...

It's over. And I can breathe again. :)

We had our Primary Sacrament Meeting Presentation practice yesterday. It was a NIGHTMARE. I had expected it to be rough, but not like that.

There was a mother in tears physically wrestling her son. She's one of our teachers and two of her boys happen to be the most difficult in our primary. She finally told me that she didn't think this was working out and they didn't show up this morning.

A little boy told me he had to throw up right in the middle of the practice. So of course I grabbed a garbage can and held it under his face while running him into the bathroom. Then, once in the stall he made a pathetic puking sound and came out in less than a second. I asked him if he needed to throw up and he told me he did. When I told him there was nothing in the toilet he told me that it was invisible. Then he asked me not to call his mom because he didn't want to get into trouble.

And then there was the usual. Kids were rowdy. No one was paying attention. I couldn't get an accurate time for how long the program would run, in case we needed to add or cut anything. It was loud. The kids seemed not to know the words to half the songs.

I literally had nightmares all night last night. Did not sleep well.

Then I woke up late this morning, rushed to get the three of us fed and ready, dropped the kids off at my second counselor's house, and then hurried to ward counsel. After ward counsel, my counselors (and the kids) met me at church and we rushed to set the extra chairs and things on the stand (we have a HUGE primary) as well as tape name tags on each chair so the kids would know where to sit.

Oh! And in the 24 hours between our practice and sacrament meeting this morning about 1/3 (yep, one third) of our primary called because they were sick and not going to make it. We've had mono, swine flu, another stomach bug, and a serious cold going around our community like crazy!

So once we were set up, I scrambled to catch each of our primary teachers and let them know what to do with the parts of the kids who weren't there.

Finally I got Jack settled with one of the AWESOME young women in our ward who had volunteered to take care of him for me through the meeting.

And then I sat down to wait.

I knew it would turn out just fine. But I never expected that it would turn out INCREDIBLE. There was such an amazing spirit throughout the meeting. I cried through most of it. And then again as I attempted to tell the kids how proud I was of them when we were back in primary.

Those children have such pure testimonies. And when they sang that sacred music I heard angels of the Lord singing alongside them. It was so beautiful!

I love this year's theme for Primary. I love teaching His children that families are eternal and the importance of families. As overwhelmed as I have been by this calling, I am SO SO SO grateful for it! I have so much to learn from these children, our Heavenly Father's children. This is such a wonderful church. It really is His church, His gospel. And I love it with all my heart!

Monday, October 19, 2009

Weekly Weigh In - Week 4

Well, I lost about a pound. I weighed 171.2 lbs this morning. I'm telling myself two things. One, I have a new scale, so maybe the two scales were just off from each other a little, so I'm not seeing perfectly accurate results. (Although my new scale is pretty awesome. I made Jason help me take it out of all the packaging, get it all programmed, and then I played around with it for a few minutes there in the store to be sure it was what I wanted before buying it). :) And the second thing is that maybe because I've bumped up my workouts I'm gaining muscle? I'm hoping it's both. :)

One to two pounds n a week is good. It's healthy. But I'm still bummed. I'm not gonna lie, I like seeing a bigger loss on the scale. It's really motivating to see results. But numbers aside, I'm fitting into a smaller pants size. So that's progress! I still have a long ways to go, but I'm headed in the right direction and that's what really matters.

I plan on letting myself splurge a little tonight. I made this decision last night before I knew today's numbers so that it wasn't a choice based on emotions. I didn't want to do it because I was all bummed out. I think I've been a little too hard on myself this week. I worked really hard! I ate healthy. I cooked every night (aside from leftovers night). And I worked out six days this week, some days twice in a day! So we're going to a local Mexican restaurant for dinner tonight and I'm getting whatever sounds delicious. I could try to get a more healthy option, but I just don't think I should have to do that ALL the time. So I'm eating great today, splurging on some yummy chips and salsa and guac and something cheesy and fatty and delicious tonight, and then back at it tomorrow. Because splurging a little here and there makes it feel less restrictive and is just more fun!

I'm sure I'll have a stomachache after dinner. And I'm sure I'll step on the scale in the morning and have a gain. But I don't care because I have until Monday to lose it and worry about the numbers, right?!

As for goals, well, I'm doing good with the ones I have. I would set more this week, but I have too much going on with kids' well check appointments, visiting teaching, house cleaning, cooking, dishes, and other household chores, ballet, playgroup, library story time, preschool, Jason being gone, our primary program practice on Saturday, and the program this Sunday. So I'm just keeping up with the ones I have. My big goal this week is simply to stay on top of my workouts and eating while surviving life in the meantime! Hopefully I don't die doing it all. :) I really am SuperMom, aren't I?! Ha ha ha ha ha!! (Really, in case you don't catch the sarcasm there, just note that it will not all get done, something will slip through the cracks, I'll probably call Jason crying that I just can't do it 2-3 times this week, and my guess is that the kids will get yelled at more than they deserve simply because Mom is too tired to try real discipline.)

Saturday, October 17, 2009


So because of my anxiety I function best following strict routines. Some of them are silly. But they help me feel better. They give me a strange and calming sense of control. I'm going to share one of them with you. By sharing this with you, I am revealing to you how truly neurotic I am.

So each morning, my alarm goes off at 5:00 am. I roll over and turn it off. It goes off again at 5:15 am. This time I turn it off and get up. I'm not sure why, but that extra 15 minutes of sleep gets me up.

Anyway, I say my morning prayer and head straight to the bathroom to pee. I drink 96 ounces of water each day, so I always wake up with a very full bladder. I have to stop drinking at about 6pm to avoid waking up in the middle of the night to pee. (I'm sure this is WAY more than you wanted to know, but guess what. This is my blog and I can write what I want). :)

So I pee, then step on the scale in the nude. I know it probably sounds silly to some of you, but for me, this gets me the most accurate weight reading. I'm not so much concerned with the number on the scale. Just the difference in the current number and previous reading.

And for those of you who think that I shouldn't be weighing myself daily I think I've explained myself before. I am only allowed to get upset at the number on the scale on Monday morning. My weight difference from Monday to Monday is what counts. However, I like to track my weight daily to see how my eating that day affected it. I make myself aware that some days I'm eating a little less, some days a little more, and some days I intentionally splurge. On the days I splurge I like to see how much I really splurged. Or on Fast Sunday I like to see what kind of a difference that made. Even though it doesn't matter. Like I said, I'm neurotic.

The morning ritual goes as follows: Wake up, pray, pee, weigh in, get dressed in work out garb, make and eat breakfast, check blogs while I eat breakfast, read my scriptures, and then workout.

Why am I telling you all of this when you probably couldn't care less? Because:

So, as of Wednesday I was down to 170.5 lbs from Monday's 172. A whole pound and a half! I was actually really surprised by that since I've been at it for a few weeks now and I generally start to taper off to just a pound or two a week. I thought maybe because I had bumped up my workouts this week, that had been the difference. I didn't plan to continue that way for long, but it was exciting!

Because I had been doing so well early in the week, I didn't feel guilty for eating one of those ghost cookies Wednesday night for FHE. So when I had gained half a pound the next morning I knew that it was probably a result of the minor splurge the night before and it didn't bother me at all.

I ate really well and worked out hard that day. And woke up the next morning with another half pound gain. This time I was confused. I wouldn't have been surprised if the number had stayed the same, but I had actually gained weight. That didn't make sense to me with my workout and eating.

I decided not to let it bother me because it wasn't Monday. If Monday's number wasn't a reflection of my hard work I would just have to take a much closer look at things.

Then this morning, I woke up, prayed, peed, stepped on the scale in the buff, looked down to see the number...and it was blank. Stupid scale! I thought the battery must just be dead. It hadn't been replaced in over two years.

In case you were wondering, true love is running to the grocery store for a lithium battery for your neurotic wife at 5:30 am.

So Jason came home, changed the scale battery, and nothing. It wasn't the battery. Must be the scale. The thing may or may not be under warranty, but I have no clue what I did with the warranty and it wasn't that expensive anyway. So Jason ran back to the store and bought me a new scale. He really does love me. :)

So he brought home the new, more expensive scale. I read the little manual. This scale actually had a few added features. It was better than my old one! So I stepped on. 173.6 lbs. Huh? That can't be right! I didn't gain another 2 pounds in one day! I was really, really good! I even enjoyed a movie at the theater with my husband while he ate candy and popcorn and I chewed my gum!

Well, maybe there's just a difference in the scales and if I just weigh myself tomorrow morning I'll be down from this new number. Fine. I can live with that.

So, I took my hair out of my ponytail and took off my wedding ring and stepped back on the scale, just for fun. 172.4?! Now, my ring is beautiful, but it's not the hope diamond! Geez! It doesn't weigh an entire pound! (But can you imagine?!) :)

I put my hair back up and my ring back on and went back to the scale. 173.4 lbs. Stupid scale isn't even consistent. Different number every time I stepped on. I repackaged the scale. Jason's returning it later today.

So I have no idea how much I weigh today. Which isn't a huge deal. It just would have put my mind at ease because of the weird numbers earlier in the week. But I feel super off today. Like, it's already almost 10am and I haven't read my scriptures or worked out. I've been too busy looking up bathroom scales online.

Any suggestions? Anyone have anything they really like? Or know about a type that will give me an accurate, consistent reading? I want something nice, but I'm not willing to spend more than $50. (Although I'd really love to buy one of those industrial scales they have in doctors' offices for a few hundred!)

By the way, I'm not completely obsessed with my weight. I know it probably seems that way because I'm posting about it all the time and because, well, as you can see/read, I'm super neurotic. But I'm mostly normal. It's just a lot of hard work and I need to be very aware of my health in order to reach my goals. Just try not to judge me too harshly. :) Thanks!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Family Home Evening

We try to do FHE on Monday nights, but because of Jason's work schedule it rarely works out that way. So last night we had Family Home Evening.

Our lesson was on Friendship. We talking about who some of our friends are (neighbor kids, school friends, family, and the Savior). We talked about Jesus' friends when he was on the earth. I told the kids the story of Jesus, Mary, Martha, and Lazarus. Then we talked about how Jesus treated his friends and how we can show our friends that we love them.

It was a short and simple lesson (just right for my 4 and 2 year olds). Afterwards, for our activity, we made Ghost Cookies. (Thanks for the cute idea Alli!!)

We made enough to take to a few of the kids' friends and some for the ladies I visit teach and the families Jason home teaches.

Our treat (which I'm sure was obvious) was Ghost cookies!! :) The kids had a blast! It was messy, but super fun. I love my family. My husband, my kids, my siblings, parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, and everyone! I really think I'm the most blessed girl in the world when it comes to family. Can't get enough of them!!

Monday, October 12, 2009

Weekly Weigh In - Week 3 (ish, I'm switching days)

A few things first.

1. Liz, get a blog. You always comment and I always want to comment back or something on a blog. Just do it. Because I said so. Or I'll start telling everyone about Dolly and Barbie Parton. Although, that could be embarrassing for me as well...

2. To everyone who is offended that I'm no longer your friend on facebook: It's not you. It's me. :) I got off of facebook a few weeks ago. Jason and I had been talking about it for a while, and then I read some articles in the Ensign that just made me realize that, FOR ME (not everyone), I needed to quit wasting my time on the internet. I needed to set limits for myself. And the best way for me to do that was to get off facebook. I spend way too much time as it is reading blogs and shopping online and doing internet banking. I just didn't need another reason to sit in front of my computer.

3. Thank you to everyone who commented on that last post! You're all so awesome. I tell Jason all the time, I really am so blessed with great friends. GREAT friends. Some of you are old friends from high school. We may not even have hung out much in high school, but through this weird and crazy blogging world, I feel like you're some of my best friends. Some of you are family. (Liz, seriously, get a blog). A few of you I haven't even met in person. Just through blogging. But I still feel like you're just as close as any friend of met in person. Some of you have know me since 6th grade. (Hey Jobes!) Or for forever! (Holla to Tiffany and Kimber!) (Yeah. I just said "holla". I'm seriously that awesome). But no matter who you are or how I know you, I love you all! And I really appreciate all the advice and support you give me. Losing weight is hard for me. I don't know how long it's going to take me. And I worry all the time that I'm going to give up again, even though I really, really, really want this. So your support means a whole lot! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

That said, I don't know why but I like having my weigh in day fall on Monday. I like it to be the beginning of a new week. And it will correspond with my new workout program. So I switched it. So this is technically Week 2 1/2, but I'm calling it week 3. Or it could be 1, because it's week 1 of my new "training program". Whatever.

Anyway, I did pretty darn good again this week. I like being home and sticking with my routine. It keeps things simple and simple is easy. I cooked delicious but healthy meals this week. And when I didn't have time to cook I had leftovers instead of fast food. And I treated myself twice. :) One night the kids and I made chocolate covered strawberries. Yum! But I only made 6. We each had two. If I had made more I would have eaten more. And then last night I made cookies for our primary teacher development meeting. I told myself I'd only eat two. But then I ate another 1 or 2 in cookie dough. :) It was delicious. (I used so much self control after that! I kept about half a dozen cookies for Jason and the kids and took the cookies left from the meeting to the Bishop.) But I can't let myself feel guilty for doing it once in a while. Because if I don't let myself slip up sometimes that would mean I'm on a diet. And this isn't a diet. This is me changing my habits and lifestyle. (Cliche, I know. But true!)

So I started out on Wednesday, September 23rd at 182 pounds. BMI was 29.4. As of this morning I'm at 172 pounds and BMI 27.8!! Yay!! I've lost 3 1/2 pounds this week and TEN overall!! Exciting number!! And in just 19 days!!

Aside from numbers, I'm starting to get back into the groove of waking up bright and early. It's HARD. But it works for me. It feels good to be up and productive so early in the morning. And I'm doing good with the rest of my goals. Water seems to be such a simple and awesome help for me! I have a water bottle that holds 32 ounces. I sip it throughout the day, during and between meals, and end up refilling it three times. I pee like a racehorse, but it helps keep me full and keeps me from snacking. And on the couple of days where I haven't had enough water to drink I get headaches. I'm getting in my calories and workouts, and although I ate leftovers one too many times last week, I'm planning to try a new recipe this week that I'm excited about. Moroccan Lentil Soup. In a crockpot. So it's simple and not too messy or time consuming. Plus it sounded delicious. And healthy. :) As for getting 8 hours of sleep, well, I really do need to work on that one. But sometimes it's out of my control. Kids wake up in the middle of the night on occasion. Or I just have to get something done that the kids didn't let me do during the day. Or, like last night, Jason was home and we went to bed at 9 but stayed up talking until after 10:30. I have, however, learned to stop drinking water around 6 so that I don't wake up at night to pee. :) But I'm working on the sleep thing. Although I think what's most important is that I'm' getting up at the same time each morning consistently. My sleep pattern was so off before the last few weeks and it feels good to have a more solid routine.

I'm adding a new goal to the mix this week. I'm starting a 12 week workout program. It's Lindsay Brin's Bootcamp 12 week program. A friend of mine used her program, along with running to lose her weight and get super fit (and keep it all off!) and I'm really excited about her workouts. Lindsay seems to really care about the results of the women who use her dvds. They're tough, but doable and I don't have to workout for 3 hours a day to feel like I got a great workout, which is so important for busy moms. :)

So I plan to follow Lindsay's program, working out three times a week for the full 12 weeks, and run at least 5 times a week. Although right now I only have my elliptical machine. So I'll do that until I get a treadmill. (Hopefully this week! But we'll see.)

Another question for you all: I have the money now to buy an inexpensive treadmill. You know, the cheap ones at walmart or wherever that don't have all the cool gadgets and are really noisy. So I could go get one this week and use it through the winter and then run outside when summer rolls around. Or I could stick with my elliptical until January when Jason gets a huge bonus and I could go buy a big fancy treadmill with the built in fans and programs and ipod docks and everything. Which would also be a MUCH higher quality treadmill. :) I'm anxious to start running now. I took your suggestions and looked at that Cool Runnings website. Their Couch to 5K program seemed like just the right thing for me. I can push myself without overdoing it and being able to run a 5K in just 9 weeks would be a GIANT accomplishment for me! So do I wait and go for high quality? Or start now before I lose my motivation (which hopefully wouldn't actually happen) and get something less expensive? Or maybe I should just grab the low quality one now, use it until January, and sell it for a portion of my money back on ksl or something?? I'm kind of liking that idea! :)

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Help me!! Runners needed!!

The "Fun Run" during gym in junior high. That's when my loathing for running began. I just didn't care and it was so frustrating that I was being forced. And timed. I didn't mind sports or other activities. But running just seemed boring.

So I haven't run in...a really, really long time. Really, really, really. Seriously. When I try, my joints hurt and my lungs burn and my boobs bounce (even with a supportive sports bra) and I just hate it! I don't mind that "feel good burn" of exercise. Sometimes it's hard to get motivated enough to start, but once I get going I like it. And I like waking up with stiff/sore muscles the next day. Not painful, but enough to know that I didn't something good the day before. I like pushing myself. I really like that. But running is different for me.

But I really want to change it! I don't know that I want to do races all of the time, but I know I want to say I've accomplished one. Because for ME, it would be a HUUUUUUUGE accomplishment.

See, I run on my elliptical every other day. I can go for quite a while. Several miles. But running and an elliptical machine are NOT the same. And running in Maryland is not the same as running in Wyoming. VERY different. This altitude is hard!

So, the help I need is this: Where do I begin?! Do I run outdoors or on a track or on a treadmill? (Although I think the fact that Jason is never here to watch the kids would mean I should probably get a treadmill, so I can run while they sleep). And then, what kind of treadmill do I get? Or instead of getting a treadmill should I get a membership at the rec center and run on their track and pay for the child care? (Although it's ridiculously priced and probably isn't even opened at the time of morning I want to run anyway). And do I start out walking or speed walking or jogging or just running? And how far do I go? And how long will it take before I notice a difference?? HELP!!

Seriously, ANY opinions and advice will be much appreciated. Because I want to start Monday morning. And if you don't comment, I'll have to figure something out on my own and I think if I have to do that I just might go cRaZy!! :)

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Weekly Wiegh In - Week 2, a day late

So I weighed myself yesterday, expecting to be very disappointed in myself. You see, last Wednesday, Thursday, and also Friday morning-afternoon I did awesome!! I worked out hard and I ate great. But then I headed to Utah. I dropped the kids off with my parents and then headed to get my hair done and run a few errands. I got home later than expected (darn BYU game traffic!) and hurried to bathe the kids, have family scriptures and prayer, and get them to bed. Once that was done, I was FAMISHED. I had eaten lunch and took a sliced apple to get my hair done to tie me over until dinner. At this point it was about 9pm and I had only eaten a puny apple between then and noon. So I grabbed for the quickest thing I could.

My mom made delicious corn chowder with crumbled bacon and a yummy baguette. I knew it wasn't healthy, but I'd been good and I was hungry and I don't believe in depriving myself of anything. I took a small portion of chowder, one slice of bacon crumbled, and one small slice of bread. I would have been fine with that. But then I had seconds. Even though I wasn't really hungry anymore. Just because it tasted so good.

Well, I wasn't going to let one night be an issue, so I woke up the next morning resolved to do better. But Dad made waffles for Conference morning breakfast. Luckily, they were whole wheat waffles, and I topped them with delicious fresh peaches and fat free cool whip. I got back on track and ate healthy the rest of the day...until dinner. We waited to eat until after the boys got home from Priesthood. I was starving again. And dinner was leftover chowder. Arg.

Again, I resolved to do better the next morning. But Dad was making omelets. (I think my dad secretly wants me to be fat). Well, I withstood the temptation by having an egg white omelet with loads of veggies and minimal cheese. Again, I did great the rest of the day. Again: until dinner. Steak, mashed potatoes with Au jus, and fresh veggies from the garden. I loaded up on those fresh veggies. And I shared a portion of steak with my kids. But those dang potatoes!! They are my weakness. I heart them. And I ate not one, not two, but THREE helpings. I meant to stop at just the one, but they were screaming my name! And two would have been plenty, but then Jack didn't finish his, and I couldn't let that deliciousness go to waste!

Well, then Monday rolled around and I had pretty much just given up. I ate pretty well all day and then headed to McDonald's with a friend and all the kiddos for dinner. And I had ice cream.

Oh! And I forgot to mention that my mom sent me out one night to buy Halloween candy, which she uses every year to fill her thousands of candy dishes around the house. So I'd have a piece or two here or there, until Sunday night when I completely gave up and let myself eat it in handfuls.

By the time I left Tuesday morning, I was so happy to be heading home! I felt gross and was ready to get back to it. But you know how it is coming back from a trip. I had laundry and primary stuff to catch up on. I was way behind Tuesday night and ordered pizza. It was convenient and it meant I didn't have to wash many dishes.

And that's why when I stepped on the scale Wednesday morning, I was expecting a huge disappointment. To be honest with you, as bummed as I was to not see another 6 1/2 pounds missing, I was SHOCKED that I didn't GAIN anything!! Yay for me!

But I'm still struggling this week. Going out of town throws me so off! I got the laundry done, but I still have a bunch of stuff to catch up on. My house desperately needs to be cleaned. I have to work on some primary stuff. Bills need to be paid. And I left my favorite workout dvd in Utah. :(

I'm really struggling to get back to working out at 5. Tuesday night I was asleep by 10 and last night by 9. I go to bed early, and yet I still couldn't drag myself out of bed! I actually slept in until 7:30 this morning. That's MORE than enough sleep. I just need to force myself back into the habit. If I'm not up at 5, I honestly don't have enough time in the day to get anything done. I need that alone time in the morning to get going and to do things for ME.

I found out at my doctor's appointment on Monday morning that I'm anemic. Until I knew about it, I hadn't noticed any symptoms. So I feel like simply knowing has thrown me off. I'm supposed to start taking a multivitamin, but that just stresses me out. Anytime I've taken a vitamin supplement before I've felt nauseous. I don't really want to deal with that.

Another thing is that I really need to get to the grocery store. I came home to a few moldy items that I need to replace. I eat berries and things pretty regularly, but they go bad fast. The problem is I just haven't had the time to get to go through the fridge and cupboards and make a list. I'm sure once I get to that I'll feel a lot better. It's so easy to eat healthy when I have quick, healthy, yummy options staring back at me from the fridge.

Well, enough of me complaining. I really should get off the computer and make my grocery list, pick Payson up from preschool and head straight to the store. Then maybe I can make up for today's missed workout tonight after the kids are asleep and I'm watching The Office!! :)