Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Better Late Than Never!

Four years, eight months and one week ago today the BEST "accident" of my life happened. About three weeks later I knew I was going to be a mom. I hoped and hoped that I'd have a boy. I was the oldest kid in my family and always envied anyone with a protective older brother. I don't know why. I guess the movies made it look great. I guess I'm strange.

Then during my twenty week ultrasound the technician showed us our beautiful baby girl. I cried. Of course it was a girl. My perfect little angel.


I honestly never once even felt a twinge of sadness. I was more than happy. I felt more than joy. I was in love with that little girl. Had been all along.

Then on January 20, 2005, 8 months to the day from the "accident", I held the most perfect, angelic, gorgeous baby girl I had ever seen.


When she was just hours old, I held her little hand in the nursery (she was in the Level 2 NICU because she was early, so I couldn't hold her as much as I would have wanted to) I looked at that perfect little baby and cried to my mom. When she asked me what was wrong I said through my tears, "One day, she's going to tell me she hates me!" Hormones. :)

Now she's four going on fourteen. I can't believe how grown up she is. She says the funniest things and has such a little attitude. She makes it SO HARD to be mad at her! She's a wonderful little helper. And she loves her little brother so much. She especially loves to boss him around.

For her 4th birthday party she requested that everything be High School Musical themed. Napkins, balloons, cake, cups, tablecloth. We even played the soundtrack during dinner.


After pizza, we opened presents. She got Gabriella and Troy (from High School Musical) Barbie dolls for Christmas and all she wanted for her birthday was Sharpay. And of course, she got it. Along with books, a couple of movies, and Barbie clothes.

That silly girl was delighted with every second of her little party. Then when it was time for bed, she climbed up on her daddy's lap, gave him a "bear hug" and "bear kiss", and asked in the sweetest little voice, "Daddy? Can I pleeeeeeeeeeeeease have a sleepover tonight for my birthday? Pleeeeeeeeeease?" (For Payson, a 'sleepover' is getting to sleep in mom and dad's bed).

We both laughed at her precious four year old manipulation. And how do you say no to that? So of course she got her sleepover.

I can't even tell her how much I love her. She made me a mother. She taught me what it means to truly love unconditionally and showed me how wonderful it is to sacrifice your mind, body, and spirit in exchange for just being in her life. I'm so lucky to be HER mom. I'm the one who got that one. And she's amazing! She's brilliant and beautiful and sweet. And she has such a tender little testimony, even at just four years old.

We've had hard days, of course. But I'd take a million more hard days over not having her around.


We love you more than you'll ever know, Beautiful Girl!! Happy (late) 4th Birthday!!

14 comments:

Lali Johnson said...

Happy Late 4th Birthday Payson!!! What a cute ode to your daughter, McKenna. How precious.

Randi said...

Lucky little girl to have you for her Mommy! Happy late birthday Payson!

Emily said...

i agree she is so lucky to have you too! i love how you write. it always seems to be exactly how i am feeling. thank you!

Christiansen's said...

I love that she is such a High School musical fan, I still to this day have not seen either of the movies. Your little girl is so precious and what an AWESOME "accident" :)

Megan said...

So sweet...and honestly, I'm jealous of what you've got. Such a cute family and ADORABLE kids. I'll have it someday, too!

The Larson Family said...

Happy birthday to your little girl! I love what you wrote about motherhood. You captured just how I feel about it too.

The Brandt Clan Fam! said...

I can't believe she's four. Time sure doesn't seem to go slowly like it did when we were kids! :) We love you all and miss you, too! Happy Birthday sweet little girl!

The Lewis Family said...

Happy day for her, I can't believe she is 4! Then again, mine is turning 4 this year too... where has the time gone? Little man is turning one in 2 weeks... ahhh! Kids, I swear their milestones make time go into warp speed and 4 is a big one :)
~C

Erin and Family said...

That was beautiful. Lucky little girl to be in your family! It was so great seeing you guys this week! Love you all! Take care.

Jobi Niu said...

PAYSON!!! We miss you. Jett does FOR SURE! HAppy Birthday cutie. HSM.. ha ha ha I LOVE IT! you're the sweetest lil' girl. :]

Sara said...

Great tribute to your baby girl - she's a cutie.

Justin Nixon said...

Happy birthday to Payson... good job Mckenna with the mommy work..
So i'm a little confused. I thought that a "little accident" happens when the accident is born.. not when conceived..Or are you trying to say that sex was the little accident? :)

Breeann said...

Happy birthday Payson! McKenna, I cant believe you have a 4 year old! What a fun age. You are lucky to have each other.

Brianne said...

she is darling McKenna! Being a mommy is THE BEST!